Dating Apps & Technology · 9 min read
A dating app that lets random strangers match users? Sign me ...
Skip to navigation View image in fullscreen A dating app that lets random strangers match users? Sign me up! Polly Hudson New dating app Rivet lets a random group of volunteers pick users’ matches, AKA gives interfering busybodies who think they know best free rein over strangers’ love lives. This is the chance…

Staff Writer · November 6, 2026
Our take
The dating app landscape is getting wilder, and we're here for it. A new platform, Rivet, is letting strangers pick your matches, a concept that sounds delightfully chaotic yet surprisingly intriguing. In an era where endless swiping has left us numb and often disappointed, the idea of an outside perspective, even a random one, could be the shake-up we need. This isn't just about outsourcing our dating decisions; it's about challenging our own patterns and opening ourselves up to possibilities we might have otherwise overlooked. At Next Boyfriend, we believe in embracing the unexpected, and this new approach to matchmaking might just be the catalyst for finding a love that’s anything but predictable.
Key takeaways
- The relentless cycle of swiping left and right has become the digital equivalent of a restless sea.
- The core appeal of Rivet, as explained by its founder Taru Kapoor, a former Tinder executive, lies in its ability to "surface a lot of people that you may otherwise swipe past." This is a crucial distinction from the hy…
- The Guardian article humorously points out the inherent desire many of us have to play matchmaker.
- Of course, being on the receiving end of matchmaking, whether digital or analog, comes with its own set of challenges.
The Rise of the Digital Matchmaker: Why Rivet is More Than Just a Gimmick
The relentless cycle of swiping left and right has become the digital equivalent of a restless sea. We’re constantly searching for that perfect wave, only to find ourselves adrift in a sea of sameness. Enter Rivet, a dating app that dares to ask: what if the power to find your next romantic connection wasn't entirely in your own hands? As the Guardian article highlights, Rivet hands the reins to a group of random volunteers, essentially inviting a collective of digital busybodies to meddle in our love lives. While it might sound audacious, the premise taps into a deep-seated human desire for connection and, perhaps, for a little external guidance in the often-confusing world of modern romance. This isn't just about outsourcing our dating choices; it's a fascinating experiment in curated serendipity.
Beyond the Algorithm: The Appeal of Human (and Not-So-Human) Intervention
The core appeal of Rivet, as explained by its founder Taru Kapoor, a former Tinder executive, lies in its ability to "surface a lot of people that you may otherwise swipe past." This is a crucial distinction from the hyper-personalized algorithms that dominate most dating apps. Those algorithms, while designed to learn our preferences, can inadvertently trap us in echo chambers, showing us more of the same. Rivet, by introducing the element of human (or at least, volunteer human) judgment, aims to break free from this algorithmic rut. The idea is to prioritize quality over sheer quantity, encouraging users to take a chance on someone who might not tick all their usual boxes. It’s an invitation to embrace the unexpected, to step outside our comfort zones, and to potentially discover a connection that a purely data-driven approach might miss.
The Frustrated Matchmaker Within Us All
The Guardian article humorously points out the inherent desire many of us have to play matchmaker. We’ve all been there, looking at a friend seemingly dating the "wrong" person and thinking, "I know someone perfect for them!" Rivet taps into this very instinct. It gives a platform to those who genuinely believe they have a knack for pairing people up, even if their supply of single friends has been "exhausted." The app essentially validates this urge, providing a structured outlet for our matchmaking aspirations. For those who find joy in seeing others happy and connected, Rivet offers a novel way to contribute to that happiness, albeit with strangers. It’s a testament to how deeply ingrained the desire to facilitate love is within human nature.
Navigating the Minefield of Arranged Introductions
Of course, being on the receiving end of matchmaking, whether digital or analog, comes with its own set of challenges. The Guardian piece eloquently describes the agonizing decisions involved in presenting potential matches – deciding the order of photos, the agonizing uncertainty of rejection, and the delicate art of delivering the news. When a stranger, or a group of strangers, is making these decisions for you, the stakes can feel even higher. There’s a vulnerability in handing over your romantic fate to others, especially when you haven’t personally pre-vetted them. This raises questions about trust, expectations, and the potential for awkwardness when the volunteer's "perfect match" doesn't quite align with your own reality.
The 'Why' Question: When Others See What We Miss
Taru Kapoor's observation that "It’s very easy for most of us to look at a friend who may be dating the wrong person and ask: ‘Why?’” is a profound one. This outward perspective is precisely what dating apps like Rivet aim to leverage. We often become so entrenched in our own dating narratives, our own patterns of attraction, and our own blind spots, that we struggle to see the bigger picture. Friends, family, and even well-meaning strangers can sometimes spot potential connections that we, blinded by our own preconceptions, might completely miss. Rivet essentially systematizes this observation, empowering a community to collectively scrutinize profiles and identify potential synergies that individual users might overlook.
A Mother's Love (and Masterful Deception) in Matchmaking
The anecdote shared in the Guardian article about a mother’s clandestine matchmaking efforts is both heartwarming and cautionary. The lengths she went to – sifting through replies, secretly meeting the suitor, and orchestrating a "chance" encounter – underscore the dedication and, at times, the elaborate schemes involved in traditional matchmaking. This story serves as a humorous reminder that human intuition and a genuine desire for a loved one's happiness can manifest in unexpected ways. It also highlights the inherent risk and potential for emotional entanglement when third parties are deeply invested in the outcome of a budding romance. While Rivet's approach is less personal, it shares this fundamental element of external influence.
The Power of the "Other": Challenging Our Own Preferences
One of the most exciting prospects of an app like Rivet is its potential to dismantle our preconceived notions about who we're attracted to. We all have our "types," our go-to profiles that catch our eye. But how often do those types actually lead to fulfilling, long-term relationships? The Guardian article touches on how Rivet "prioritises quality over quantity and encourages users to take a chance on somebody who isn’t their typical type." This is where the magic could happen. When a stranger, unburdened by our personal history or our ingrained preferences, makes a suggestion, they might be seeing something in a profile that we've been conditioned to dismiss. It’s an opportunity to broaden our horizons and discover that love can bloom in the most unexpected of places.
The Paradox of Choice: Less is More?
In the age of dating apps, we are drowning in choice. This paradox of choice can lead to decision fatigue, anxiety, and a constant nagging feeling that there might be someone "better" just a swipe away. Rivet's model, by limiting the number of matches presented and relying on external curation, offers a refreshing antidote to this overwhelm. Instead of endless scrolling, users are presented with a carefully selected few. This curated approach can foster a greater sense of intention and thoughtfulness. When you know that a match has been specifically chosen for you by someone else, you're more likely to invest time and energy into exploring that connection, rather than treating it as just another option in a vast digital buffet.
Building Trust in the Digital Age: Can We Rely on Strangers?
The fundamental question for any user of Rivet becomes: how much trust can we place in the judgment of random strangers? The Guardian piece hints at the potential for devastating rejection and the excruciating process of vetting someone’s attractiveness. Building trust in the digital realm is already a complex endeavor, and handing over a portion of our romantic destiny to a group of unknown volunteers adds another layer of complexity. It requires a leap of faith, a willingness to be open, and a recognition that the volunteers, while strangers, might be acting with genuine goodwill. The success of Rivet will ultimately depend on its ability to foster a sense of community and accountability among its volunteer matchmakers.
The Future of Matchmaking: Beyond the Swipe
Rivet represents a fascinating evolution in the dating app industry. It’s a departure from the purely algorithmic approach and a move towards a more human-centric, community-driven model. The Guardian article’s wry commentary on the allure of interfering busybodies is, in a way, a testament to the enduring power of human connection and the desire to help others find happiness. As we continue to navigate the complexities of modern dating, platforms like Rivet offer a glimpse into a future where matchmaking might be less about individualistic swiping and more about collective intelligence and curated serendipity. It’s a bold experiment, and one that’s definitely worth watching.
Actionable Insights for Your Dating Journey
While Rivet might be a new frontier, the principles it embodies can be applied to your current dating strategy:
- Embrace the "Type" Breaker: Make a conscious effort to swipe right on profiles that are outside your usual preferences. You might be surprised by who catches your eye.
- Seek a Second Opinion: Don't be afraid to ask a trusted friend or family member for their honest opinion on a potential match or your dating approach. Their perspective can be invaluable.
- Be Open to the Unexpected: When you do go on dates, try to approach them with an open mind. Focus on getting to know the person rather than ticking off a pre-defined list of qualities.
- Practice Generosity in Your Own Social Circle: If you know two people who might hit it off, consider making an introduction. The joy of successful matchmaking can be incredibly rewarding.
The Takeaway: A Leap of Faith in the Digital Cupid's Arrow
The concept behind Rivet is undeniably intriguing. It plays on our innate desire for connection, our fascination with matchmaking, and our potential exhaustion with the current dating app paradigm. The Guardian article, with its witty and insightful commentary, perfectly captures the audaciousness and appeal of this new approach. In a world where algorithms often dictate our romantic choices, the idea of entrusting a small part of that decision to a collective of well-meaning strangers is both radical and, for some, incredibly appealing. Whether it's a fleeting trend or a genuine shift in how we seek love, Rivet is certainly a conversation starter, reminding us that sometimes, the most unexpected paths can lead to the most beautiful destinations. It’s a reminder that in the grand quest for love, a little bit of faith, a dash of curiosity, and perhaps, a touch of well-placed interference, might just be what we need.
Questions about Dating Apps & Technology
Which dating app is best?
It depends entirely on your goal. Apps skew differently by intent, age, and region — some toward serious relationships, some toward volume and casual meeting. Match the app to your goal rather than joining whichever is largest, and read platform-specific reviews before investing time.
How do dating app algorithms work?
Most rank profiles using a desirability score derived from how people who have swiped on you behave, then show you profiles with similar scores. Activity matters too: recent, frequent, selective users generally get more visibility than dormant accounts that like everyone.
Why do I get so few matches?
Usually photos and specificity, in that order. Clear, well-lit, face-forward lead photos outperform group shots and filtered images, and profiles with concrete detail give people something to respond to. Swiping selectively rather than mass-liking also improves how the algorithm ranks you.
Keep reading
- Guide: The Intentional Dating Guide: How to Date with Purpose, Not Just Hope
- Guide: Rebuilding Self-Worth: How to Stop Settling and Start Choosing

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